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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27174409">El Pollo Loco</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicianofesperance/pseuds/magicianofdeviance'>magicianofdeviance (magicianofesperance)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>El Pollo Loco [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Miraculous Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Sex, Bisexual Male Character, Crack, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Smut, Gay, Gay Sex, Lila Rossi Bashing, M/M, MarcNath November, Nathmarc November, One Shot, Public Sex, Smut, Vaginal Sex, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, marcnath</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:01:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,952</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27174409</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicianofesperance/pseuds/magicianofdeviance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When the city is run amok with horny vaginas and bussies flying through the air, despite Chat’s massive stamina and sexual appetite, Ladybug cannot convince Chat to pleasure them all and save Paris. They need to call reinforcements.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Marc Anciel/Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Sabine Cheng/Tom Dupain</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>El Pollo Loco [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997932</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>El Pollo Loco</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>READ: A little crack, fluff, and smut all wrapped up in one. Be warned it can be quite Problematic (with a capital P), featuring some meme-y, non-canon, shallow characterizations.</p><p>The "Graphic Depictions of Violence" tag is for a sentence involving Lila that is honestly quite skippable if you're uncomfortable, which it's also the only time she's mentioned.</p><p>All characters aged up to 18+</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ladybug held out the Miraculous box. “Nathaniel Kurtzburg, this is the Miraculous of the Cock. It grants the power of Penetration. Will you use it for the greater good?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Nathaniel could answer, Chat cut in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know, I’d say </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> cock is pretty miraculous, m’lady. I’d hope you could use it for our own </span>
  <em>
    <span>greater good</span>
  </em>
  <span> sometime.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Business before pleasure, Chaton,” she replied with a kiss.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But my dear, sweet, precious Lady. I cannot possibly describe just how hard you make my cock.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She let out a sigh and picked up a coin that was next to her foot. “Okay, Chat. I’ll let you sleep with me if you can win this coin toss. If it lands on heads, I win. If it lands on tails, you lose. Got it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat grinned. “Yes, m’Lady.” He couldn’t take his eyes off her as she flipped the coin up in the air, her titties just jiggling off her chest like two globs of gelatin trying to escape and attach themselves to his hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Heads!” she shouts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With no hesitation, Chat unbuckled his pants, ready to whip himself out for her. “Head it is then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No. I said </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> win if it lands on heads.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat raised his brow. “If you’re not sleeping with me, then what are you winning, really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel stared at the both of them. “Should I give you guys some privacy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat nearly fainted “When the fuck did he get here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ladybug could only facepalm. “No, Nathaniel. I need to give this Miraculous to you, with your permission, of course, so you may help us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel let out a devilish grin. “So I have to penetrate something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat raised his brows, understanding. “Oh yeah, Marc can’t stop raving how well you topped him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel rolled his eyes. “Of course he would. It’s on-again off-again with him, but I really think he’s catching feelings.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Isn’t he your boyfriend?” Ladybug asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel looked her straight in the eye. “He’s my </span>
  <em>
    <span>bottom. </span>
  </em>
  <span>There’s a difference. And he’s not even the only one. I’m too skilled at topping to let it go to waste all on Marc.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat’s eyes were half-lidded, bemused. “What’s your body count?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thirty-four. Yours?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He glanced at Ladybug. “Let’s just say I’m holding out for my lucky number one-hundred.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She huffed. “It’s actually one-hundred ninety-eight. He keeps his civilian and transformed counts separate.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat bit his lips in lust. “I can’t tell you who she is -for identity reasons, of course- but to my civilian self, she’s my </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everyday Ladybug.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” He couldn't help but to adjust his pants.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel glanced her way. “What’s your body count?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat’s eyes widened. “How have I never asked you that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed, turning away. “It’s only two.” She reminisced back to the two men she slept with. Félix was a decent </span>
  <strike>
    <span>friend</span>
  </strike>
  <span><em> acquaintance</em> with benefits, but he could never satisfy her desire to be with the real Adrien. Luka, on the other hand, was simply wonderful. He tended to each and every need and desire she had.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat grinned. “Ah, waiting for that classic </span>
  <em>
    <span>lucky</span>
  </em>
  <span> number three, I do see.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stared cross-eyed at him. “Chat! The akuma has turned half of the city into horny flying vaginas, gobbling up the citizens like dildos and you refused to fuck any of them to try and save Paris! I had to hire the next best professional to do it instead.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat licked the backside of his paw. “You know I have my conditions, m’lady.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She presented the Miraculous to the boy before her again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel reached out to the kwami, landing in his palms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not the first time I’ve had a cock between my hands,” he muttered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey y’all, I’m Orikko, the kwami of Penetration. To transform, yell ‘Strap On!’ but to detransform, say ‘Strap Off!’ When you need to use your power, just yell, ‘Cuck!’ You got all that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel nodded. “I do. Orikko, Strap On!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a bright flash of orange light, Nathaniel looked over his body. His head was covered in a chicken mask, complete with a beak and feathers. “I am El Pollo Loco,” he said, with a heroic stance. His fists pressed against his hips. On his toolbelt he found his weapon. Actually, it was moreso his </span>
  <em>
    <span>protection.</span>
  </em>
  <span> “A giant condom?” He looked at his tool belt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ladybug nodded. “You’re going to need it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ladybug, Chat Noir, and El Pollo Loco flew to the skies, landing on the mayor’s building. Amongst the sea of vaginas and bussies, one stood out to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would know that bussy anywhere!” Nathaniel out. “Cuck!” Suddenly, he was hard, eager, and raring to go. He looked down to his pants. Before him sat his six-foot-long penis. “How am I supposed to travel with this thing?” He looked at them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat chuckled. “You helicopter, of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>El Pollo Loco lifted his cock, throwing it over his shoulder, getting the condom on it with some help. He swung it around, which it gave off a mighty </span>
  <em>
    <span>swoosh</span>
  </em>
  <span> sound. “Someone could get knocked out with one hit of this thing!” He swung it around again and again, before it started moving on its own. Before he knew it, leaves and dust started blowing away from the ground beneath them as he started flying through the air at his first target: Marc’s bussy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The ass cheeks were flapping like lips, devouring people whole. He dove straight into Marc’s bussy, cock first, filling and stretching the anal cavity with his massive cock. He kept thrusting, deeper and deeper, entering Marc’s second hole. The hungry bussy was in pure ecstasy, paralyzed at the painful and excruciating pleasure Nathaniel was doing to Marc’s male G-spot. He needed a mop and a bucket for that Wet Ass Bussy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As El Pollo Loco attended to his business, Ladybug checked the bakery to a sight she didn’t want to see. The giant flying vagina that was Sabine’s could almost be considered small, at least when compared to the other man-devouring colleagues around the city. Hers was immensely set on Tom, unable to get the intense width of his body in all the way. Tom was truly a muscular man, which his massive pecs, back, and arm muscles weren’t able to fit down her hole. It was just like when they first started dating. Tom truly did have a gifted schlong, even in those early years when they were so young. Sabine couldn’t take it then and it took over a year to get her body capable of taking his extensive length and girth. To this day she swears she should’ve practiced with a rolling pin. The nostalgia brought a tear to Tom’s eye, even as he was about to be swallowed whole by his wife’s vagina. His fruitful, meaty body, rubbing up against the vaginal walls and entrance left Sabine’s vagina to sit in writhing pleasures.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pretty soon, both bussy and pussy climaxed. The holes started foaming a brilliant dark violet colour, overcoming their form. They sat, defeated, exhausted, and satisfied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the distance, after the classic phrase “Lucky Charm” was called out, the clitoris of Lila Rossi’s cannibalistic vagina was cut clean straight off with a pair of red gardening shears with black polka dots. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Moving from hole to hungry hole, Nathaniel moved on. His stamina was outrageous, which he hadn’t climaxed once since starting his journey to have sex with a quarter of Paris in under two hours. He intentionally set the best hole for last. The one he’s been eyeing for weeks. Xavier Ramier’s. There was nothing about that man that heterosexuality could explain. Xavier’s ass was not subtle. With each step of the way, Nathaniel could hear the clap of his cheeks from forty feet away. He craved that man’s muscular, toned ass and today, he was going to have it served to him on a silver platter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Moan for me, pigeon man!” Nathaniel cried, penetrating that sweet ass. He was too turned on by this, growing an extra foot worth of length. He didn’t have to strain against the tightness of the hole, a clear sign that he had indeed bottomed before this akumatization. Some flying bussies had been confused, like Kim’s. Kim never bottomed before, so trying to devour a person whole without training beforehand was an awkward experience. Especially when El Pollo Loco came in to fuck the tightness out of it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Xavier’s bussy managed to moan through his hole, like some kind of ventriloquist. Nathaniel was in utter ecstasy finding his rhythm against Xavier. He increased pace, which from what he felt beneath his hands, his bussy enjoyed it too, quaking for more and more, urging him to try and enter further. Nathaniel toyed with the hole, slipping and thrusting the seven-foot cock in and out of the man. Nearly the whole time Nathaniel had been slipping in and out of what was considered ‘the second hole’ by many. From the shaking and paralyzation of Xavier’s satisfied ass, purple ooze foamed from the hole as release. At the sight of it, Nathaniel couldn’t take it anymore, finally reaching his peak orgasm, filling the tip of the condom with a gallon’s worth of semen. He’d probably feed a whole glass of it to Marc for his lunch later that day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Exhausted, Nathaniel passed out. When he woke up, he was passed out on Marc’s bed as his normal self and without the Miraculous. As he opened his eyes, Marc simply grinned at him, handing him his tall glass of semen for lunch. </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘Oh, how he knows me so well. I should probably reconsider his feelings.’</span>
  </em>
  <span> Their twin glasses clicked against each other. From the corner of Nathaniel’s eye, he spied the rest of it in a champagne bottle on ice. </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘And he has some excellent class about it too.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>After they both took a long sip of their glasses, Nathaniel began. “I want to talk about us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc frowned. “I know, this is a little much. I’m really trying my hardest to not make things seem too romantic. I must admit, I really do like you more than just a fuck-buddy, but it’s hard when I have you, yet don’t have you all at the same time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He held onto his hand. “I went through an experience today, that I probably shouldn’t talk about, but I will anyway. I was the chicken man that slept with a quarter of Paris today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc gulped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I even got to fuck Xavier Ramier. He is my dream daddy, let me tell you. Have you seen him as Monsieur Pigeon in that skin tight suit? He is so damn hot-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel saw the light and hope escaping from Marc’s eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But, what I wanted to say was, that I’m over it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc lifted his head. “What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel nodded. “I’ve had enough meaningless sex to last me a lifetime in the span of two hours, which lunch time didn’t even pass yet.” He glanced down at his watch. It was barely 12:30 P.M.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc grabbed a plate from the desk behind him. “Oh yeah, here’s a sandwich I made you. A croissant stuffed with cheese and ham.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nathaniel grabbed the plate, putting it beside him, reaching out to Marc instead in a firm embrace. “What I’m trying to say, Marc, is that I want to commit to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc smiled. “I do too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So will you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will I what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Marc Anciel, will you be my boyfriend?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marc wrapped his arms around Nathaniel, pressing their lips together, sealing their love. They sucked face so hard it was surprising to see there was still any pink left when they pulled away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, Nate. I will be your boyfriend.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yeah. It’s rated Mature, but it is <em>so</em> not.</p><p><a href="https://discord.gg/ZWZdjYkUyC">Come and join the Superior Miraculous Server on Discord!</a><br/>We have weekly, monthly, and seasonal events, games, parties, and many fun activities with an active community of over one hundred members</p></blockquote></div></div>
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